Self esteem - a choice

Self Esteem Is a Choice

You're already showing that you're willing on some level to take action toward improving your self esteem simply because you're reading this page. Allow me to congratulate you on making this decision, for recognizing that you will benefit from examining this aspect of yourself is a major step in the right direction.

How you choose to view yourself is entirely up to you. No one dictates or can force you to see yourself in any particular way. You may have influences, history or learning experiences in your past, but it takes you to subscribe to these ideas. It takes 2: one person or circumstance to try to influence you AND your participation and willingness to agree with it. Otherwise, it remains a neutral event and dies there. If you don't like your reflection, you and you alone can shift that. That's a good thing and a challenging thing.

Challenging if you don't yet believe that you have the ability to change it.

Good since you have the full capacity to see yourself in any way you want.

Take Responsibility

Hand in hand with seeing how you view yourself as a choice is taking responsibility for your actions. Assuming a victim stance is the first give away that your self esteem needs work. I love to crack at this one; people don't stay victims long when I'm around because I quickly get them to see how they've created their circumstances, so they can create others. You'll get no pity here, but you will get support and praise for becoming accountable to and for the only entity that you are responsible for....YOU.

One of the manifestations of taking responsibility is finding solutions in your life. When you recognize that something is not going the way you want it to, do something about it. Instead of staying entrenched in your problems, find solutions. Ask questions and be willing to hear answers that may be difficult to hear. Taking action toward solution finding is a sign of self efficacy and inner fortitude, which all contribute to confidence. When you take on a challenge and strive toward a resolution, your sense of self improves with each endeavor, regardless of the outcome.

Your willingness to seek answers is the most important self esteem building component here. Despite the consequences, your motivation to quest, inquire, explore and take action is essential to improving your sense of self. No one I know feels good about sticking their heads in the sand. Knowing that you were willing to look at a situation and take measures to improve and innovate is sexy.